It's time for the tides to turn.

Fall is here, folks. Can you feel the freshness in the air?! Ugh. It makes me overwhelming happy to be free from the stagnant summer of 2011. You've heard me go on and on about this, but seriously- this summer has just not been the greatest in the world for me. But you know what? In light of recent realizations and with the advent of a new season, I can already feel things changing for the better. For one, I'm making pretty good money at Taco Mac with the beginning of football season! Granted, I'm being worked...alot. (14 hr days anyone?!) But monetarily it's all good in the hood if you know what I'm sayin'. Also, I know it seems minor- but I now actually have a couch and working washing machine in my apartment! This is a huge step to making my apt. feel more cozy and like a living space instead of a dorm. It is a pretty great couch too, I must say, esp. for it being from Goodwill! Now all we need is a coffee table, TV, entertainment center and some dining room furniture and we'll be set for cozy livin'.

In addition to all that, I came across a sort of epiphany with this whole situation that's been plaguing me about this guy. I realized that even though I was getting some positive signals, what it all boils down to is if someone really wants to pursue something with you and see you, they will find a way. It's that simple. It's like that book, "He's just not that into you." It sucks- but once your realize it, it's so freeing! It's like- there's no use struggling and fighting tooth and nail for something that isn't there. So I just gave it up, and I feel great! :)

So yeah, things are definitely on the upswing and I'm very grateful. I'm not letting myself wallow in negative thoughts any longer.

Because I am trying to not seem like a debbie downer in other social media networking sites- I'll let it all out here.
I'm really not happy right now.
I just got off a 16 hour shift. As in...I got to work at 10 AM and did not leave until like 2:00 AM. With no break. It was the start of football so things were absolutely INSANELY busy...my feet literally feel like they are about to fall off. Ugh. Granted- I made a lot of money tonight, but it all needs to go towards things like bills and paying for my passport, etc.
Lately I feel that is all I have been able to do with my life is just work work work. No time to be social, no time for creativity and anything artistic that actually makes me happy- just work. And I tell you what, I'm weary. Physically. Emotionally. Absolutely drained.
And in addition to that I'm just sad because I'm making realizations that are extremely difficult to come to terms with and that of course is a burden on me.
SO basically right now I feel tired, drained, lonely, and sad.
And on top of that I'm still dealing with the whole post-college transition which if course is still difficult.
Long story short- things have definitely been better in my life.
I'm still waiting on confirmation of certain things from my agent before I can even start booking, too, so that is frustrating of course.
I just want things to turn around. Desperately!
=/