Thursday, May 10, 2012

Skin Battles.



Ever since the horrible onslaught of puberty, my skin has been a veritable warrior zone for all sorts of skin problems. Acne, scarring, you name it. Pair that with an OCD-like tendency to pick at my face when I'm nervous, bored, etc. you've got a recipe for disaster! I've tried pretty much every skincare program under the sun. ProActiv, Murad, AcneFree, the Philosophy system, etc. At one point I was doing completely natural products such as Herbalism by Lush and tomato and lemon juice masks. They all worked to a point....then the acne came back.

Curses!

Out of reading many reviews I decided to look into buying a Clarisonic Mia.

The Clarisonic Mia is a sonic powered cleansing brush that is supposed to get your face the cleanest it will ever be- I mean this thing makes your face SQUEAKY clean. As alot of acne and blemishes are caused by clogged pores, this exfoliates and cleanses your face in a pristine fashion, reducing acne, clearing skin texture, etc.

Or so they say.

So after a significant monetary gain, I decided- why not?! I've tried everything else! The hundreds of glowing reviews on various make-up and shopping sites can't be wrong.

So I bought my Clarisonic at Ulta which comes with a mini cleanser and a charger. The Clarisonic is waterproof too which is great because you can use it in the shower!

After the first use, I could feel a significant difference in my skin ALREADY. I mean, to be completely honest with you- before this I was washing my face using my hands. Yes, exactly like in those cheesy cleanser commercials. I literally am that person that does that. Lather up soap in my hands, rub it on and splash it in a dramatic fashion over my face....well not THAT dramatically... ;) But that's pretty much how I did it. Obviously, that method is probably not the most effective for removing all the makeup and residue off my face, so no wonder why I suffered from frequent breakouts!

In case you are wondering, the cleanser that I use is just a generic Clearasil cream cleanser. It works really well with the Clarisonic and weirdly I don't really like the cleanser that comes with it as it seems pretty drying. Which, having such an oily face as mine is really saying something I think!

For the first few days my skin felt like it was really getting refined and clean and it seemed to be clearing up! But then in a few days I started breaking out pretty bad. After researching I see that this is what is called a "purging" period- when all the gunk trapped in your pores starts coming out and getting inflamed. I had alot of gunk in there (Gross, I know.) So naturally my skin was in freakout mode. However, it's been a couple weeks now, and I do have to say that my skin has leveled out.

One thing that I changed about my skincare routine though was I bought some Persa Gel- which is a 10% Benzoyl Peroxide treatment, to treat my acne. In addition I am using a witch hazel toner to really get everything deep clean. The Clarisonic is great because you can feel your pores really opening and it allows the medication/toner to really get down in there and do its job better. You can also feel your skin "sucking up" moisturizer. It's pretty crazy actually.

After this new regiment, I am definitely seeing a large difference so far! I have alot of bumps of deep set acne in my face, small little colorless bumps that are just annoying, predominately in my cheeks and on my forehead. Although now I have to say alot of them are going away or are greatly reducing in size and visibility which is awesome!

Here are some make-up free pictures for reference:
Pretty clear there! Excuse my eye- I didn't get all my eye makeup off so it looks like I have a mini black eye going on which I don't haha. 

My cheeks are a trouble zone usually- as you can see I have alot of mini scarring. I think they call this "ice-pick" scarring? I'm not sure. I'm going to look into some scar remedies. (If you know of any great ones, let me know, too!)

Forehead. I think you can see those mini bumps there- they used to be pretty pronounced but now not so bad!

In general I'm actually pretty pleased with my skin at the moment. I've still got a few blemishes that are kind of working its way out of my system, but overall I'm pleased with the results of my new regimen using the Clarisonic and Persa Gel.

I will update later on and let you know how it goes! I hear the Clarisonic over time really dramatically improves the look and texture of your skin so I will let you know how it goes.

By the way- celebrities recently have been tweeting pictures of their make-up free faces. The latest by 90210 star Annalynne McCord is quite eye-opening as it shows that she doesn't have the most perfect skin. It's actually pretty refreshing because sometimes in this industry it's easy to get caught up with being perfect all the time.


 And you know what? We are HUMAN. We are not MANNEQUINS. We're NOT perfect. And that's totally okay! And you have to stop taking everything so seriously.










I'm extremely self conscious about my skin but you know what? It's really not all that bad! And it's something alot of people deal with. Nobody should expect photo-shopped perfection 24/7. Its just not real.



If you have any great skincare tips let me know! Also be sure to follow me on Twitter if you aren't already!

xoxo

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

What Makes You Happy?

So, I've been graduated for a year already.

First of all, WHERE did the time go?! It seemed like it was just last week when I was walking across that stage, ready to face the "Real world" and eager to get out of the somewhat rigid college lifestyle. No longer was I bound by the restrictions of classes! I was going to take over the world!

Or so I thought.

Don't get me wrong- I still fully intend on taking over the world (I'm not exactly sure what the implications of that are....yet....but basically all I'm saying is I want to do BIG things!) However one of the main things I've had to learn is that everything is not just going to come together at once, immediately. Success, however you want to define it, comes with an obligatory "hustlin'" period- one in which many difficulties are faced and lessons are learned. It's definitely not easy, and everyone's periods last different lengths of time- however, they are very much necessary, I think.

So as I approach my second post-graduation year, I had to evaluate myself and my career and the direction I was heading. While I have definitely explored so many new directions with my acting career as well as opened new doors with other skills that I have, I realized that I was feeling stagnant.

First of all, I'm at a job that is not the worst job ever, yet still doesn't really fulfill me creatively. Haven't been getting much work through my agent which is a little disappointing. Even modeling and make-up gigs have been pretty scarce here recently! And even though I've had some wonderful things and people come into my life, I still was feeling a little bummed and just restless. So needless to say, I had to do a little thinking.

What is it that makes me happy? The one thing that just makes me feel alive and like nothing in the world can go wrong?

Performing live theatre. The stage. Music. Lights. The audience.





There is absolutely nothing that thrills me quite as much as performing live theatre does!

So why have I been not necessarily focusing on it this past year?

Well, as soon as I graduated I was kind of overtaken with so many film opportunities that I decided to just run with it. And like I said, it was great to kind of broaden my experience and horizons in that way. However there comes a time when you have to really get back to the basics, really. I was a little discouraged by the ATL theatre scene initially, but now I'm at this point where I'm like.....wait. If OTHER people can do it- then I can too! I just gotta be savvy and get in with a good company. If it means doing some interning/admin work, then so be it.

It's interesting too because earlier in the year I was dead set on moving to L.A. eventually, pursuing film- but after my recent trip to NYC, I've decided that I just love the city so much and that it really feels like home to me. And interestingly enough, it's coinciding with my recent rekindling of theatre. So who knows what will happen.

Not knowing is half the adventure ;)

So recently, I've begun hardcore audition searching for theatres, and had an audition yesterday that went really well! I vibed with the directors and staff immediately and it was great to do a reading instead of just a 60 second monologue/song combo sort of thing. I felt like I was back in a comfortable place that I'd missed. So here's hoping things start turning around!

So now I ask you, what makes you happy? If there was anything that you could be doing that would make you happier than the things that are taking up your time right now WHY are you not pursuing it! Life is too short to waste on things that suck your soul. Start today and go after what you truly want to do. It may be a struggle at first, but in the end it will be so worth it! You are capable of ANYTHING!