Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Contemplations on my so called love life.

Those of you that have known me since high school have always known me to be the "long-term relationship" kind of girl. For some reason, I always ended up dating people for long periods of time. And I don't necessarily regret that, as I have learned lots of things from it. But, ever since college started, I have been so hesitant to actually commit to a relationship with anyone. And it's not that I'm not over my ex or anything, it's just that I feel like as soon as I get in a relationship that there will be this huge cloud over me, this huge obligation to please someone else with whatever I do, and if I don't please them, then I have to deal with phone arguments or what not...and it's not just something I want to get into.

I hate to lump all boys together, but I just feel like there are very few guys that can handle dating me, as ever since I have started college. I am a very difficult person to be in a relationship with. First of all, there is my major: Theatre. That in itself is a deterrent to many guys- (well not of course, to OTHER theatre majors, but that's another story.)
  • First of all, being a theatre major requires long hours of rehearsal in addition to class/homework time. Which in turn equals into not very much boyfriend/girlfriend bonding time.
  • Also, at times being a theatre major will propose a situation in which you have to play a romantic lead, which, when you are dating someone who does not act, it can lead to bouts of jealousy, even though it is just acting.
  • Especially in the theatre department, you get close to lots of people rather quickly, including people of the opposite sex. Many boyfriends don't take kindly to hanging out with other guys, even if it is obvious you are just friends.

So theatre in itself makes it hard to date anyone. Add to that my serious dislike for talking on the phone, (not having ACTUAL conversations, but the whole "I'm on the phone just to be on the phone" thing) and my scatterbrained-ness, and that is a real plan for disaster.

Haha, I suppose it just means have just not found the right one yet. But as of now, I'm not really trying to. I still don't want to get married until I am at least 30, and I am content with that.

I find it easier to focus on myself and my career for now, so I don't have to compromise my life for anyone, even a boyfriend. Sure, that may sound selfish and maybe it is. But I just have to look out for me. Because if you don't look after yourself, nobody else will. I think it's so important to nurture your passions in life and go for them full-force, no matter what!

So anyways, I am single and have been for about 6 months or so. And I'm totally cool with that! If there is a guy out there that can handle me in all my glory... haha... then he will show himself when the time is right. It is just important to me to have fun and enjoy my life right now without the burden of pleasing someone.

And that is all. =]

2 comments:

Brittain Mackinzie said...

Any guy would be lucky to able to date you! But I think you have the right idea with focusing on what makes you happy. We all know theatre doesn't make anyone's love life easy.

Robin said...

haha, it's ok.
we will just be cat ladies.